Mid year pre-emptive resolutions

My New Years resolution started 6 months ago, and this is how I’m justifying posting a NY resolution post a week after New Years. Shit happens.

I really went to the gym for all the right reasons, health, happiness blah blah blah, it’s so on trend at the moment, blah blah. My awkwardness and gym do not mix (lets ignore the lack of Lorna Jane and Lululemon), why? Oh let me count the ways….

1. My Personal Trainer, Franco,  called so for the all the obvious reasons, reasons which resulted in me freaking out as I sweated. Causing him to tell me to calm down, prompting me to say  “your so good looking, I wasn’t prepared for someone good looking, it’s making me panic!” …smooth…
2. Running on the treadmill felt good, I mean I could do it, so I did, for 20 mins ( my 2nd ever time at the gym) which then caused me to get the worst stitch of my life and collapse, on the floor in the middle of the crowded gym…smooth…
3. Quoting The Simpsons to a complete stranger is never a good idea. Whispering “I have no soul” from The Simpsons after my third consecutive treadmill refused to turn on for me is really not a good idea. You look incompetent and just f’kn weird…..so not smooth…

So my New years resolution is to survive the gym. More awkward situations are inevitable (hey the above happened in my first week) but if I can just keep going back….well that’s all i’m really asking.



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